Anyone who has said the Lord’s Prayer will recognize the part that says-
...forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And don’t let us yield to temptation, but rescue us from the evil one. If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:12-15

Today, I want to discuss forgiveness. It is a word that is often spoken especially in church circles but I suspect that it is something not fully understood. There is power in forgiveness—greater power than we sometimes realize.  Jesus forgave us...as He told us to forgive others and this is not a recommendation—it is a specific instruction straight from the Lord’s mouth.

The word Forgive (Aphiēmi) has a wide range of meanings, stemming from the words Apo and Heimi.

Apo means to bid farewell amongst other things. It describes sending something away, separation, departure, cessation, reversal and completion. This is already giving us an indication of what forgiveness means—sending something away. Hiemi is an intensive form of the word Eimi that means to go. This means that whatever it is we have to forgive has to be sent away and gone...
The Amplified version says-

And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven (left, remitted, and let go of the debts, and have given up resentment against) our debtors. Matthew 6:12

Verses 14 and 15 state-

For if you forgive people their trespasses [their reckless and willful sins, leaving them, letting them go, and giving up resentment], your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
But if you do not forgive others their trespasses [their reckless and willful sins, leaving them, letting them go, and giving up resentment], neither will your Father forgive you your trespasses. 

Please notice the first word in each passage quoted... “and” and “for”. They link the passages with this one-

And don’t let us yield to temptation, but rescue us from the evil one. Matthew 6:13 

Temptations assail us all. We are not immune from them, but we have the power and authority to overcome and not yield to them. Jesus told us to ask that God would not allow us to yield and that He would deliver us from the evil one. Looking at it from a different perspective, if we do not yield, we deliver ourselves. It would seem that such deliverance is conditional which is, to forgive.  This is very important, because if we give in to those temptations, the principle of forgiving and being forgiven does not work. This could imply that such temptations, trials, or testings is not referring only to the weaknesses of our flesh nature, but to the emotional and spiritual forces released in the act of forgiving others. In simple terms, if we do not forgive others for things, then we may not be able to receive forgiveness from God when we need it. It would seem that we give the enemy a legal loophole or foothold in our lives to put us to the test and if we fail, we fall in to sin. 

If someone offends us, it may be intentional or deliberate. How we respond can be treated accordingly, but there is a common denominator and that is love. We have the power to choose how we respond. When religious bigots tried to trick Jesus up on The Law about the first and greatest  commandment in Matthew 22:34-39, He said that we are to love! Such love is not sloppy sentimentalism, but one of the most powerful driving forces in creation. God loves us so much that Jesus took on humanity and died for us, but also raised Him from the dead. 

Love is not an option! It is a command! We don’t have to like everyone. There are certain people that are just plain hard to like, but we have to love them in the same way that God loves them and I am convinced that we need God’s help to be able to do that. Sometimes we have to love on them by faith! You know what I mean. Some people are not just a thorn in the side—they are a complete bush.
We need such faith because the old nature often does not want to let go; to forgive and love.

We want to be justified. We want to be proved right and the other wrong. We want vengeance and vengeance is not justice. This is wanting to get even. Jesus never did that! He never yelled down at the crowd, “I’ll get even with you when I come back” but said, “Father forgive them.”

Jesus told us in Luke 6:27 to love our enemies and we sure need a good dose of faith to love those who get right up our noses, torment us, lie to us and lie about us, attack and vilify us, steal from us and treat us badly. I’m talking about believers too! What makes such attacks so serious is that Christians should know better. We expect them to love us and believe in us. That is why it hurts so. 

We don’t expect people in the world to love us, so it does not come as a surprise when they come against us, but fellow Christians? Naaah! They wouldn’t hurt us...would they?

Some of you, as I have personally experienced, have been deeply hurt, let down and scandalized by other believers.

A certain group of  Christians once conducted a smear campaign against me to the extent that I thought of taking legal action against them. Some of those folk stole from me and when I approached their pastor, he merely shrugged it off and laughed. They were some of his “leaders”.
When I asked the Lord about it, He told me, “Do nothing, Say nothing.”
It’s hard to do that and you want to give them a big bunch of fives as the tabasco sauce starts to come up your legs.
I should correct myself. I started to complain about it (don’t you want to have pity parties sometimes?) when He said, “Welcome aboard son. You’re in good company. They did it to me and they will do it to you too” and then told me not to do or say a thing. You see, He vindicates us. He is the righteous judge and His judgment is right!

So I discarded the paperwork I was preparing to give to my lawyer and told him to forget it. What happened?
Churches failed and I know that one pastor left the ministry—a dejected, broken, forlorn man. One of the ringleaders died. Another suffered a broken marriage when his wife suddenly left him. Several years ago, I felt led of the Lord to visit him, so Marjorie and I went to his home. He opened the door and I saw one of the saddest, forlorn men I have ever met. The house was all but empty and was cold and dismal, when it was once a pretty place full of music, joy and laughter. I offered to help him, invited him to our home for a meal and he admitted he was one of the ringleaders in the group that fell apart. He never came for that meal and we do not know what happened to him.

The bible does tell us to treat God’s servants right. Saul wanted to kill David. He pursued him and had really lost the plot. The occasion came when David could have killed him, but refused, because he knew that God justifies and that God had anointed Saul, so he would not touch that anointing. 1 Chronicles 16:22 and Psalm 105:15 states that we are not to touch God’s anointed and do His prophets no harm. The word of God tells us that our conversation is extremely important. Words can kill! Jesus told us in like manner that such things are as good as committing murder.

“You have heard that our ancestors were told, ‘You must not murder. If you commit murder, you are subject to judgment.’
...I say, if you are even angry with someone, you are subject to judgment! If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you are in danger of the fires of hell. “So if you are presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the Temple and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you,
leave your sacrifice there at the altar. Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God.
“When you are on the way to court with your adversary, settle your differences quickly. Otherwise, your accuser may hand you over to the judge, who will hand you over to an officer, and you will be thrown into prison. And if that happens, you surely won’t be free again until you have paid the last penny.

Matthew 5:21-26 

I do not want to give you a false impression in any way, but that group were not attacking me personally, but God. They were touching the anointing God had deposited on my life. I forgave them, but it was not easy. I had to forgive them or I would be out of order, so sometimes we need to exercise faith in such matters. I will touch on Luke chapter 17 shortly, but here, when Jesus was speaking about offenses and forgiveness, the disciples knew it was not easy and asked Him to increase their faith. They already had faith, but to forgive in the way Jesus said, required an extra dose of it! 

We might not “like” certain folk, but love has to be present. Each of us has individual traits...mannerisms; likes and dislikes, preferences or ways of talking for example and they may differ from those exhibited by others. Some people are loud talkers, gushy and tend to be “pushy” whereas others are quiet and reserved, so we need to be mindful of such things and walk in love regardless. Even if we have personality clashes, or others operate differently to us, our attitude is to respect and honor what God is doing in their lives, or honor the position they occupy. I will qualify that statement by adding that the office has to be one chosen and appointed by God.

I have seen churches fail and ministers no longer in the ministry and some of them “deserved” to go under for a whole range of reasons—but the church members were hurt! Many Christians simply quit because someone “offended them”.

Others leave because of failed expectations and so on, which is another matter, but when the love walk starts to falter, it is not the time for others to criticize and judge them, but to love on them and if necessary forgive. Rather than shoot the wounded as many churches do, it is time to love the unlovely, bind up the wounds, pour on the healing balm and embrace the brother or sister in acts of forgiveness.
The father of the prodigal son did that, but the other son had a poor attitude. I call that the non-prodigal spirit and it is everywhere.

Now I am not talking about turning a blind eye to error and pretend nothing happened. Mistakes happen! Sometimes they are willful and deliberate, whilst at other times they are just that...mistakes. If someone makes a genuine mistake and later comes to you and says, “I am sorry”, what are we to do? There are all kinds of possibilities, but one is to accept that act of repentance and forgive. We need to remember that sometimes people are sorry because they have been caught out and are suffering the penalty, but do not want to change. What we are to do then is to take several steps. The first one is to ask the Holy Spirit to show you what to do and/or say. Follow that lead. Ask for scriptural understanding.

I know that there are times when someone keeps on doing that thing. How do we handle things then? Let us see what Jesus said about it. In Luke 17, He teaches us to avoid occasions of offense. They will come. You can be sure of that, but make sure that you are not the one who causes them.

AND [Jesus] said to His disciples, Temptations (snares, traps set to entice to sin) are sure to come, but woe to him by or through whom they come!
It would be more profitable for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were hurled into the sea than that he should cause to sin or be a snare to one of these little ones [lowly in rank or influence]. Luke 17:1-2 

Before I moved to Mount Tamborine, I visited a church several times and witnessed how there were groups of people who never related to other groups. They were doing what James told us not to do in James chapter two. I urge you to read it carefully and whilst you are at it, continue onto chapter 3. It happens only too often in many churches and as a church grows larger, it is easy to get lost in the crowd and fall through the cracks if the pastor is not careful.

One Sunday evening, I sat in the rear of this church and observed. The pastor asked people to greet each other and I saw the same groups of people greet the same groups of people as they always did, whilst others were ignored. A man called Charley was there. He was not “one of them”. He had a kind of spastic disorder that caused him to walk funny, look funny and talk with a speech impediment. He stood there expectantly, wanting someone to come to him, but people walked around him. I could see disappointment and hurt coming on his face when the Lord told me to go to him. 

I introduced myself, “Hello. I am Robert.” He struggled to get out, “duh.......I’m Charlie” and a big grin came on his face. I gave him a great big hug and said something like, “Hi Charlie. I love you man” as he drooled and dribbled over my shoulder. It was definitely not pleasant, but an amazing thing happened. A sheer feeling of joy suddenly overwhelmed me and the Lord told me, “Thank you. I love him too.” I can still feel that exuberant joy today. Later during the week, I was strolling down the street in town and saw him on the other side and stopped, to yell out, “Hey Charlie. How are you going?” and he froze on the spot. That massive grin came on his face and he blurted out some kind of answer as the Joy of the Lord again flooded through my being.

Members of that church were giving cause of offense. He could have walked away from God and gone to hell over that. It is easy to love the lovely, but if you are not wearing the right school tie or are not in a certain category of folk, some people don’t want to know you. That’s not what Jesus wants and it happens only too often. Look however at what the Lord said next-

Pay attention and always be on your guard [looking out for one another]. If your brother sins (misses the mark), solemnly tell him so and reprove him, and if he repents (feels sorry for having sinned), forgive him.
And even if he sins against you seven times in a day, and turns to you seven times and says, I repent [I am sorry], you must forgive him (give up resentment and consider the offense as recalled and annulled). Luke 17:3-4 

We are our brother’s keeper. We are to be careful in how we act in life and we are supposed to care enough for each other that we should be able to gently (and in love) let the other person know something is not quite right. I am not saying we are to criticize and judge each other, but when someone has offended us, we should let them know how we feel. Rather than point an accusing finger at the other person and  tell them, “You did such-and-such to me”, perhaps it would be better to let them know how you feel and explain that you are feeling that way because...
Use wisdom here. Allow the Holy Spirit to lead and not the old carnal nature. That old man wants to give a blast!

How may times are we to forgive? I’ve taken you already to Luke chapter seventeen. Look now at Matthew 18. Here the disciples came to Jesus with a question of who is best. It seems that this is an ongoing question (who has the biggest church? Whose ministry is best? Etc.) and Jesus spoke of being like little children and receiving each other and of avoiding the source of offense. He told us that He came to seek and to save the lost, which means that He did not come to judge us in the way we think of judging.

He is the Good Shepherd and told us about the shepherd seeking for that one lost sheep and rejoicing when he found it. He left the 99 behind to find that one precious one. He did not abandon the 99, because he knew that they were safe and secure. Why?  He trained them! That one sheep was precious and it was His! When he found it, He was overjoyed. Jesus told us that our Heavenly Father is not willing to lose one! You are extremely precious to God.

Now from verse 15 onwards, Jesus touched on how to handle offense. He described how we, especially pastors, should handle it. Go to the other person. Share your heart and how you feel. Explain how you are being hurt because you were offended somehow. That’s better than striding up like a gunslinger in a western movie, draw and blast away. Words can kill you know! We must know how (and when) to forebear in love. Paul explained-

Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.
Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.
Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.
And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.
Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts.
And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father. Colossians 3:12-17 

That gunslinger attitude is like letting loose with a shotgun and pellets fly everywhere, possibly hurting innocent people as well as the intended victim (who may actually “deserve” it).
People may say, “Oops! Sorry. I lost my temper”, but the damage has already

been done. It would be better to say that they “found” their temper instead.  

Peter asked Jesus how many times we should forgive. That is a valid and good question. I suppose that Peter was thinking in Old Testament terms of an eye for an eye and so on, but Jesus was ushering a new way of doing things. Peter was limited to natural thinking processes. All he knew up to that point, was The Law as found in Leviticus 24 that could be quite severe. Peter asked if  7 times was enough, but he was placing a limitation on it. Jesus said to do it seventy times seven. Would this mean that we can quit after we have forgiven 490 times and then get even on the 500th? I think not. I believe that the Lord was teaching us about perseverance and of doing all we can to make sure things are in order. He said to speak in private to the other person, so that our brother can be like that one lost sheep I mentioned. He said to try again if that did not work and to take a witness. Witnesses are important. Sometimes our judgment and vision can be marred when alone; clouded by emotion perhaps; angry, hurt, disappointed and so act rashly to do or say something we could later regret.

Don’t shoot from the hip. Go and find someone else who knows the truth and should be impartial and by the time you return, the tabasco sauce is no longer heating the situation and then present your case...with a witness.

Try it again a third time if necessary and if the other person still refuses to comply, let him or her go; brush the dust off your feet and keep on keeping on. The important thing is that you keep yourself pure.